"So focused are you on finding your grog, that the squawk takes you completely by surprise. You jolt upright, bumping your head hard against the table. A thousand and one sailor's curses come to mind, but you can't decide which one to use. After all, you've worked hard over the years to build up your pirate vocabulary, and you need to think carefully in order to choose the right word for the occasion."
"As you debate your potential verbal obscenities, the sword shaped novelty mug on the table tips over, emptying it's contents onto the floor. You watch helplessly as your precious grog spills everywhere, until all your left with is puddle on the floor, an empty mug, and a shattered dream.
The loud squawking continues, only adding to your frustration."
The loud squawking continues, only adding to your frustration."
Posts
Oh lady fate, why dost thou piss on me so?
ReplyDeleteClearly, you're so desperate for grog, you lick it up off the floor.
With your precious Grog wasting away, you dive under the flow, only to have the parrot beat you to it.
ReplyDeleteWhy not drink the grog as it pours out so he gets some? Oh, and when he's finished, he should try and find the parrot and throw the glass as it.
ReplyDeleteThe curse: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAH, FATE BE COLDER THAN A WITCH'S TIT!"
ReplyDeleteAnd then grab the squawker with your... hands... where the hell are your arms?! WAIT! I know your name! It's No-Arm the Fierce! You jab people with the peg-legs!
Or is this like VeggieTales where they don't need arms/hands?
- hazeleyedfae
Where's my gun? I'm gonna shoot that bird for making me spill my grog!
ReplyDeletePoke out your eye, so you can get an eyepatch.
ReplyDeleteLick up that grog, grab your sword, and verbally lambaste that hideous squawking creature!
ReplyDeleteAs we all know, the bird noisemaker is actually just your alarm clock, telling you its time to save the world again. But who wants to save the world? Who has the time? Besides, you can't exactly use your grog-induced superpowers without a stiff drink!
ReplyDeleteArhg! Why did you leave on that 'Parrot training 101' video? Obviously the parrot just isn't getting the 'retrieve jacks jar or dirt' move!
ReplyDelete